TarGet-Out!

This will be random (as if any of my other posts are organized or purposeful!), but it just has to fly out of my fingers before it explodes in my brain. Seriously, this stuff drives me insane!

1. Hey, um, blonde girl in Target, wearing your sunglasses after dark. Wow, how do I say this tactfully? Yeah, I can see your thong above your white linen drawstring pants. That is your thong right? Because the possibility still remains that you misplaced your dental floss while practicing good oral hygiene this morning. I'm just saying it's a possibility. And while I'm asking questions, who do you think you're fooling buying ping-pong balls and large, plastic red cups at 8:00 pm? We all know where you're going..and it's not to church honey! Cause I know you didn't get all skanked up for Jesus! Just do me a favor and don't chip in for the beer, you're going to need that money to bail your skeezy 32-year old boyfriend out of jail at the end of the night. Trust me on this one.

2. And you, Mr. Cashier Man. I'm aware that ringing up my cat litter and toilet paper is not the highlight of your 21-year old life, but would it kill you to make eye contact? Maybe no one's told you, and in that case you should go home and punch your dad, giving him instructions to pass it on to your mom. If that's the case, by all means, allow me to be the first to let you in on a little secret, "You are in a customer service job. I am your customer. The very smallest level of service you can provide me is to look me in the eye when you talk to me...if you talk to me!" And more than that, you are a human being and common courtesy dictates at the very least a brief glance in my general direction. Maybe you should work on it, because right now your attitude is screaming, TarGet-Out!

Ok, I'm done for today. Check back tomorrow for a less violent blog. I'm pretty sure it's in here somewhere. There are pictures of cupcakes I made with the kiddos for Easter, there are stories of weight loss success, and decorating inspiration gone wild! I will channel some of that sparkly, flower-filled energy and slap it right into this tiny, bloggy space.

Happy Tuesday everybody!